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So, as promised for a long time now, the journal update about Iowa. And since I have a pretty much free and clear weekend, there is probably even another update by Monday. So, I've broken this down by day, my lovely relaxing trip to visit G-Man of Playsure in the adult playground of Iowa. What happens in Iowa usually ends with cheese fries.

Day 1: We Visit the Dining Hall
So I arrive, and we go to pick up a bike for me to use. Here's the unfortunate part of this, I had to work a large chunk of the early part of the day. This is mostly due to my personal lack of organization in the week surrounding, but also to some light miscommunication. However, I got to work in some funkafied coffee house. I'm IMing Halff and I say, "Everybody in here is smoking American Spirits." And that was all he needed to know.

Finally, I wrap that up and it's time for lunch. Where do you go for lunch in Iowa City? To the student dining hall. Oh yes, my friends. I only wish I were hungrier, but I had a little time change going on and it felt earlier to me. G-Man made the world proud though. And can I say, we did not eat like this when I was in college. There were no fajita bars and such when I was in college. I mean, for real. Then, stomachs full, over to the honors building to play table hockey/fuseball. Fun times. How can you not relax when doing that?

But the best part of the day was after afternoon activity and before going out. We took the "Miracle" dvd and watched in in the library auditorium. We cried, or at least I did. That movie is awesome, and watching it on a super big screen in an auditorium with nobody chewing popcorn in your ear is MORE awesome.

And then bars, which for me translated to cheese fries.

I am glad I am not 22 anymore. When I was 22, I too found it awesome to spend every night of my life out at the college bars drinking until I puked. And it was awesome and I had a great time in my early twenties. At 32, I prefer a four star meal and some good wine. But it's still funny to watch the drunk girls throw it down. My favorite was the white girl who was about to go home with the African American dude until a moment of sober hit her and she suddenly realized that she was from Iowa and skulked away. You really could just sit on the street in Iowa City and watch these kids stumble around and be amused. Of course, you'd be forced to wonder about the future of America, but only until you remembered that you did that when you were their age, too.

Day 2: Davenport & the World's Largest Truck Stop
On day two, which is a Saturday, we drive to relaxing Davenport, IA to watch the Hawkeyes lose in embarassing fashion to Ohio State, excuse me, to THE Ohio State University. But there are cheese fries, so it's all good. After the game, G-Man's friends decide to give me a tour of the "Quad Cities," and we end up riverboat gambling, which is apparently what you do in the "Quad Cities." Let me sum up: old people, cheap drinks made from cheap liquor, slot machines. In short, I was in heaven. I even won $40 at the tables. Actually, I won almost $70, but then I lost $30 of it back. I know, quite while you're ahead or whatnot. I promptly used my $35 to buy us all expensive martinis at the trendy martini bar by the water. It was hopping by the water because Lifehouse was playing a show there that night.

That's right. Lifehouse.

LIFEHOUSE.

You and me and all other people. The Iowan faithful were standing in line singing it proudly. I kept hoping the show would start before we were done drinking our expensive martinis, but no luck. I did not hear the refrain I had so hoped for echoing over the great Mississippi. So sad.

On the way back from Davenport, we stopped at the World's Largest Truck Stop with is as incredible as you may believe. There is a dentist, showers, places to sleep, a movie theater, places to eat (obviously) and...shopping. Do you need a t-shirt with a fairy on it? You can select from a dozen varieties here. Perhaps a wolf or deer or other power animal on your t-shirt? Also options! Want to tell the world you support the NRA? Buy a shirt at the world's largest truck stop. But the best thing, the thing I wish I had bought, were the coveralls that some trucker somewhere would someday give to his small child. The coveralls were cammo print, and on them they said, "Daddy's Little Hunter." Oh yes. Oh yes.

That was a good day.

Day 3: Go Steelers
Day three is mellow. We take a bike ride which I struggle on because the bike is all kinds of upright and suspended and weird and it's freaking me out going down hills. And then we end up hanging out at Buffalo Wild Wings where we can simultaneously watch the Niners and the Steelers lose. But it's all good because it's so relaxing. Then a stop at the organic co-op, which is darling and a return home to watch Sunday night TV and enjoy G-Man's homemade pizza. If G-Man entered a pizza-making challenge, he would win. That is all. There is no discussion about that.

Day 3: Nature
On the last day, we enjoy nature. Actually, first we enjoy cheese fries, but forgive me that, because I'm paying for it in gym time now. In a local bar where the waitress probably has the nicest life. Then we went for a nature walk, in a beautiful nature reserve where G-Man had never been. Now, you might be saying "But he's been in Iowa almost seven years and he loves outdoor activity, how is it that he's never been there?" Yeah, he doesn't have an answer for you either. But the nature walk was lovely. And then I was going to just hang out until it was time to go. Except-again-I-had-to-work.

It was a great trip. I have a feeling by the next time I'm clear to take a trip to see G he won't be in Iowa any more, because he'll be somewhere being a professional 24 scholar...but you never know!