A Distrubance in the Force

There has been a disturbance in the force of late. A shifting of something that, for so long, was as right as rain. Was understood. Was a safe haven of knowledge in an ever changing world.

And that shift, my friends, is that Jack Johnson has replaced Dave Mathews as the cd that men in their mid to late thirties play when they want to get laid.

I am thrown askew by this change.

Now, I know what you're thinking: "Isn't it Marvin Gaye or Robin Thicke that those men play when they want to get laid?" No, no. This is what men play when they KNOW that they're going to get laid. There is a difference.

Now, the M.O. has switched. You are invited over to dinner, and afterwards, in an effort to show you how sensitive he is, your date puts on a Jack Johnson cd. This is followed by a statement like "I wish I could live more like Jack Johnson. He's so TUNED IN. He's so CONNECTED."

For YEARS, this routine played out with a Dave Matthews CD in the stereo. The line was like "Dave Matthews really understands the human experience" or "Dave Matthews really keeps it simple. Life should be that simple."

The force has shifted. And I am thrown askew by the new shift. Mostly because I dig Jack Johnson in a way that I never dug Dave Matthews, so I am more susceptable to this nonsense.

For the record, the "upsell" album if you're not biting on the sensitivity bit, which is meant to make you feel safe about getting naked, continues to be the John Mayer "Continuem" album. Often followed by this, "Yeah, I just don't understand how he could break up with Jen Anniston. She seems like such a sweet, truly nice girl."

Shut the hell up. Seriously. But at least that part I understand. Jack Johnson. The fabric is shifting. Just say it like this, "I want to listen to Judas Priest and make out. Cool?"